“You’ll be fine, you always are”
I know people say it as a compliment but it feels like more of a burden or a tactful way of minimizing my efforts, struggles and challenges. “You’ll be fine, you always are” – yuck, that just feels so heavy to me sometimes. Don’t get me wrong, I know they are right but me making the decision to persevere and others telling me that I’m always fine are two different things.
Is it my fault? Yes.
I mean I’m not exactly an open book with a table of contents that easily directs you to the right page. I don’t air every challenge that I go through. I focus on the end result of how I want my life to look like and how I want to feel every day.
When shit hits the fan in your life (and it’s going to) I get why people give up but I just don’t agree with it. I’m not trying to be insensitive or rude but we all go through things in life that change us. It’s up to us to direct the sails of the change though. It’s up to us to take the hand we’ve been dealt and play the hell out of it…
When shit hits the fan, it’s OK to allow yourself a bit of time to just wallow in, absorb and process it.
Believe me, I know it feels like it but it is not the time to feel sorry for yourself and start to break apart your day and your life in order to prove how shitty things are to everyone around you.
It’s time to buck up and starting doing the little things to change this moment and the next.
Don’t be fooled, sometimes it feels like there is nothing to live for, nothing that makes you come alive but I promise it’s just a moment, it’s just your focus…
You’ll probably get really pissed off when I tell you this but you are the one making it worse. I know because I’ve done it and will do it again.
It’s the way you are thinking about things. It’s your focus.
You are anxious because you are focusing on the future and not taking time to take care of the things that you can do right now, in the present.
All those little things that you let pile up until they swallow you whole – cleaning, going to work and doing your best, paying your bills, working out, making that phone call, organizing your junk draw etc.
You may laugh or think that I grew up with a silver spoon in my mouth so I couldn’t possibly, “get it” but I do and I’m telling you, stop right now and do something. Go clean off a counter or your desk and then come back and leave me a comment about how you feel. You know what? You don’t even have to… I KNOW that you feel more in control and better.
It’s the simple things.
You are destroying yourself because you are too busy looking back and thinking that it’s a puzzle that you can put together and somehow, magically change the way that your life is today. You can’t.
The ONLY thing that you are able to do anything about is THIS MOMENT. I know that hurts, I know you want it to be more difficult than that but it’s really not.
Now, go… do something!